So last night I believe I reached total exhaustion
to the point that I fell asleep sitting up typing my blog. Thankfully my laptop
never fell to the floor and my tiny bladder eventually woke me up. This morning
once I woke up from clearly much needed sleep, I wondered if this was a sign
that I really needed to not take on so much. Between work, marathon training, blogging,
school and my actual life, my time and life is pretty much planned up to the
minute. Looking at my room it’s clear I am never home in time to clean up (it’s
a disaster!).
The problem, I really don’t see anything that I can
cut from my routine to make more time for myself. I am trying to apply Laura
Bush when thinking of each time suck in my life and wondering what she would
do.
Work: Yeah, this one can’t really be cut as I do
need to work. Having a job that keeps me on my feet all day is just exhausting
regardless. I don’t work full time, but it feels like it most weeks. My class I
instruct hasn’t started yet, but once it does it will be another thing taking
up time. I am not complaining since I like work and am thankful that I do work,
but it still wears me down. As each day comes and more work is added either by
picking up more shifts, grading papers, freelancing for local publications, I
will just remember that Laura Bush never got anywhere sitting on her butt. She may
not need to work now, but she wasn’t always a child of privilege. She did work,
and she worked hard. The life of a starving artist is not for the weak, but I
have realized the past couple of months, it is for me. The judgment from
friends and the world hurts, but I don’t care. Money doesn’t motivate me,
happiness does. I don’t have fancy things or all the latest toys, but I do have
happiness.
Marathon Training: This takes up lots of hours, but
you don’t cross that finish line without training. People that have never run a
marathon may not understand the time commitment or why I would stay in Friday night
since I have a long run in the morning, but that is on them. Working my
schedule to fit in the runs is tough, but worth it. I have the support of my
fellow runners and that is all I need. There is no place I would rather be when
I am running. Without it, I would be a mess. After all, I do have a goal of 10
full marathons before taking a break and those miles aren’t going to log
themselves. Laura Bush I think would understand this love and passion of running
and encourage me to get those miles in.
Blogging: Ok, this I also love! I admit that I have
slacked a little on daily posts, but I am working on getting better at this.
This has already led to many opportunities, so why stop now? Rome wasn’t built
in a day. I may have to tweak my routine a little to accommodate getting back
on track of daily posts, but never fear, this blog is going nowhere. Of course
Laura Bush would encourage me to keep at this, it is after all inspired by her.
School: Grad school classes have not begun yet, but
once they do it will take the majority of my time. Not so much because of the
amount of classes I am taking a semester, but because it has been a long time
since I have been back in the classroom and I am rusty. There is an awful lot
of preparation before I even start. I sometimes wonder why I even decided to go
back to school, but like everything else in my life, it comes down to
happiness. I don’t particularly like school, but I love learning. It will be a
struggle, but it will be great once I (hopefully) graduate. When I start to
doubt going back to school I will remember how much Laura Bush loves learning
and education. She doesn’t know me, but I like to think she would be proud of
me when I receive that diploma.
My Life: This is the one thing I have to plan everything
around. By that I mean, making sure everyone around me is happy and I do as
much as I can when asked. All my life people have been telling me that I need
to step back and not do everything that is asked of me. Not attend every
function I am invited to, but that is hard for me. I am honored whenever
someone wants to spend time with me or invites me to another party. I might
complain and be like, “damn another kid’s party,” but that doesn’t mean I won’t
be there. I will be there. I do agree with some of my friends that I am taken
advantage of since people know I will always be there, but that isn’t a bad
thing. I am aware of these people, but it still won’t stop me, it is my
character.
People in my life do give me hell for being so busy
and not having time for them all day, every day, but this is me. People that
accept this fact about me will forever be a part of my life. I will always make
time for those people and they know it.
So when exhaustion sets in and I start to wonder why
my life and world is so difficult, I will stop and think about Laura Bush. Yes,
I may need to say “no” every once in a while, but when I am needed I will be
there. And also, try to find more time for sleeping and eating. I think Laura
Bush would agree.
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