Friday, January 29, 2016

I am me

“Can’t keep up with my rhythm, though they keep trying. Too quick for the lines they throw.  I walk to the sound of my own drum. It goes, they go, we go, hey yeah yeah yeah,” The Walker, Fitz and the Tantrums

Today while I was out for breakfast I had a stranger approach me and he gave me a lovely compliment. There was no hidden agenda behind his words; he was simply being nice. I don’t know how our paths crossed, how he knew I needed to hear it, or why he picked me, but I was thankful. I wasn’t just thankful for his words, I was thankful to be reminded that there are nice people in the world.
It was also a reminder to continue to be me. I am sure some reading this are thinking I am either self-righteous or self-serving, and that no one can always be as kind as I try to be. And you know what? No one can. We all fail sometimes. We all let others get the best of us. None of us are perfect.

But regardless of all this, I don’t believe I am any of the things mentioned earlier. I am just me. And here are a few things that I hope to never change about me. A few things that I hope will continue to inspire my blog and my readers.
I don’t believe in defending myself against anything that isn’t true. How can you defend something that wasn’t true in the first place? All this does is fuel a fire that doesn’t deserve to burn. All this does is make everyone look foolish.

I don’t believe in ever running my mouth about others, even those that choose to speak unkind of me or others. I left high school a long time ago. What’s the point of this? People expecting to tell me something others have said to get me to engage are often disappointed. I just listen and leave it at that. I won’t give you anything to take back and say I said. Silence can’t be misquoted.  I don’t think this makes me self-righteous or too good to be true, I think this makes me a good person. This makes me a trying person. I try every day to hold my tongue. Sometimes it is tough, but I will always try.
Don’t get me wrong, I do say unkind things. It is only human. But I try to not say them from a place of hurt or anger. And I am incredibly selective as to who I say these things to (where my girls at?). It takes me a very long time to open up to anyone about anything. And those that I do go to I hope know this. The few I have sought guidance from lately haven’t done anything to lose my trust and I hope they never will.

Along the same lines, I believe in letting others make their own judgments of others. I am not going to say anything to sway their view one way or another. When someone asks me what happened in any situation I just respectfully decline to give detail. If others involved are not there to defend themselves, I don’t want to be the reason they are viewed negatively. If you are to be viewed in a negative light, I want you to do that all on your own.
Unfortunately, this doesn’t always apply to friends. My friends hear my side of the story, but I still try to stop myself from saying anything too prejudicial in either direction. But when it comes to best friends, all bets are off.

One final note, the little things in life make me incredibly happy. This may be why I miss out on the “big” things, but such is life. I get happy when I get a new Barbie. I get happy when the sun is out. I get happy when I have a good run. I get happy when I get concert tickets. I get happy when a friend has good news. I get happy when an episode of Law & Order I haven’t seen in years is on. I get happy when a movie I want to see is released. I love the little things. I get so excited, I can’t help it. It has annoyed people in my past, but I guess some of us have to be annoying.
And I get happy about Laura Bush. I get happy when someone references her to me. I get happy when someone in my life looks at me and says, “what would Laura Bush do?”

Author’s note: This song came on earlier and I was just really feeling it. I love this band.

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