Monday, July 14, 2014

Staying quiet

“We can try to understand The New York Times’ effect on man,” Stayin’ Alive, The Bee Gees

There are a lot of lessons that can be learned by deciding to live my life, as best I can, by asking myself what would Laura Bush do? One I have really come to understand is how staying quiet when it comes to advice giving is sometimes the best bet. Laura Bush is always polite and remains classy, and I shall do the same. Most times people don’t even listen, so why bother?
Any dangerous situations always warrant speaking up, but it is the other times I have decided to just remain quiet. I will politely nod, agree, and let it go. When people come to you for advice, yet do the opposite time and time again, it is frustrating. And it gets old, really old. Even with the best intentions when giving advice, people don’t want to hear about that. They essentially want you to validate whatever it is they say, so I have decided to do just that. If anything, it will surely end the conversation quicker.

There is a difference between venting and seeking advice. Venting is a whole different ballgame. When someone needs to vent, they don’t want your take, they want to just get it out to feel better. But when you contact someone specifically for advice, one would think they want to hear from you. For one reason or another, they trust you and want your help. And what a slap in the face it becomes when they continually don’t listen.
Not all advice is always going to be perfect. There are topics that I admit I am not the one to seek wisdom from. I am up front when it is time for those topics. I am not saying to take all advice given, I am saying to at least think about it. When someone keeps making the same mistakes, same outcomes, listen to those close to you as there is a reason they are saying what they are.

And above all, don’t overreact. If someone gives you advice that you may not particularly like, don’t get defensive. Someone needs to look out for you. If you take time to let said advice sink in before attacking, you may just realize there are good intentions behind the advice.  
The past couple of weeks I have had a couple people talk to me and in the end, my words meant nothing and things turned out how I feared they would. It happens and I don’t believe all my advice is brilliant, but my reason behind said advice was one of good. But after another round of not being listened to, and me having to pick up the pieces yet again, I had an epiphany. Now I know why Laura Bush doesn’t engage. She is the brilliant one.

I will always be there with an ear to listen, but before I speak I am going to think of Laura Bush. If the topic isn’t anything dangerous to the person or anyone else, I am just going to agree and kindly support any decision they come to. I may not agree with the decisions, but I support my friends and if it is what they want, then it is what I want as well. It may not be the right thing at all times, but it is as close to being Laura Bush as I can get and that is always right in my book.
Author’s note: Any one that doesn’t respect the music of the Bee Gees is really missing out. Sometimes all you need is a great pop tune to get your day going!

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