Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Perception

“I know tomorrow brings the consequence at hand. But I keep living this day like the next will never come,” Criminal, Fiona Apple

The idea of perception, and how others perceive the same thing, has always confused me. People will see things the way they want, and because of that, issues will always arise. You may not have intended something one way, but as soon as someone perceives it that way, you are screwed. No matter what you say, once their mind is made up, nothing will change it. So what would Laura Bush do?
It seems that for a while, I have perceived something much different than another person. What I thought was simple kindness was taken as flirting. Sadly, that was never my intention. I am sorry, but it wasn’t. While it is true that I am so clueless and naïve in this area, my intention was one of niceness and nothing else. That will teach me in the future for sure. It makes me sad that people no longer recognize genuine kindness. Have we all become that egotistical that simply talking to someone about their life has to mean they are into them? Really, really sad.

Apparently this was the perception of others resulting in me being the topic of a conversation. While no one likes knowing they are being spoken of untruthfully, I look at it this way, at least they are leaving someone else alone. Fast forward to me being told some cruel things and me basically wanting nothing to do with this person for the foreseeable future.
As I have said before, no one wants to be blamed or told how horrible they are. Never did I do or say anything that would make someone think this about me, but their opinion of me is theirs, not mine. If they have an issue with me it is their problem and really none of my business.
So how would Laura Bush have handled this? Would she have just ended any friendship with the person or would she have tried a little harder? I am not sure she would have just walked away like I am deciding to do, but maybe she would have. How do I know? While kindness is first and foremost in both our lives, that doesn’t mean we will be doormats either. There is only so much one person can take. Even the nicest people have their limits. If you are going to say cruel things to a person, why would anyone want you in their life?

Sometimes people take their own issues out on others because it makes them feel better. They will talk about others in hopes others won’t find that person appealing. But even knowing this, why would you keep that person around? What good can come from that?
I am not sure that this entry is exactly how Laura Bush may have handled the situation, but I still think picking being nice over interacting with someone who has shown they can be cruel is the way to go. Not feeling any remorse for wanting no contact with them is helping me think I made the correct decision. I just don’t need another person blaming me, especially for something they perceived differently than intended.

This entry does, however, showcase a sort of growth in me. A few months ago I would have never posted this since I am so extremely private, but I felt it was time to open that door just a bit. As hard as it is for me, and as hard as it will be for me to hit the publish button, if I can help another person experiencing this, then it was worth it. I may receive backlash for it, but that is the price I am willing to pay to possibly help another person. It’s a tough world, and us lost in the world need to stick together.
I will succeed and I will fail, but I will always ask, what would Laura Bush do?

Author’s Note: This was the song playing as I was heading home tonight. It is a great song. I also thought it fit because while I don’t feel I did anything wrong, the perception of others’ may be that I did. You decide.

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